We are nearing the nine month mark now and Espen has generated enough energy to launch himself out of the earth's orbit and into outer space. On the back of his red rubber pony. This was apparently supposed to be a secret until lift off, but I happened upon him in one of the final test launches and discovered his plan. You can see that this clearly was NOT in his master scheme. 
Needless to say, the only course of action I could take at that point, was to get him sleepy on Thanksgiving turkey and let the tryptophan do the rest. 
Regardless of my attempts to keep his feet on the ground, at least until his first birthday, The Bear already had his helmet picked out and had his eyes fixed on the heavens. There is no stopping that boy when he sets his mind on something. Or somewhere. The photo he sent us of the moonscape was eerily familiar and I could only wonder if this child is actually a tiny, adorable alien sent to us from a place much like earth, to help us remember how to truly live life.
He makes sounds these days... Baa, baa BAP, daaa daaa daaaaap, that could just as easily be communication with the Mother Ship as pre-verbal practice sessions. He also loves nothing more than gazing with rapture at Christmas Lights and ooooohhhing, and ohhhhhhhhhhhhhing at them as if they are communicating special messages to him as he careens around the house trying to coax the cat off her perches by shrieking at her and burbling as he approaches. Cats, apparently, do not exist in the same form on planet . It is a good thing our floors are tile because the speed at which he crawls could easily catch a hardwood or carpeted floor on fire.
Other clues that he may spontaneously combust and reveal his true celestial nature are:
1. He hates being changed because it requires him to be still and lie on his back for FAR to long.
2. He abhors large bodies of water, like swimming pools. Hates. Them.
3. He screams at being put into his car seat unless he is very sleepy or distracted by something. (apparently the long ride here was too much for him to want to make a repeat voyage to the mother planet, even at warp speed)
4. He is freakishly strong and has started doing pull ups on the oven handle when he thinks we aren't looking.
5. He crawls in circles around other babies his age and tries to eat their faces. We're working on that.
Whatever star system he hails from however, we are most pleased to have him as the central part of our earth family. Should he decide he must return to another planet at any point in time, we will, of course, join him. In the meantime, we are taking regular naps so as to keep up with him, buckets of water and hugs in tow, for when he inevitably goes harder and faster than his chubby baby body can handle and ends up bonking his head, yet again. Merry Christmas and may all your babies stay at room temperature.
No comments:
Post a Comment